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Oct. 15th, 2017


Where Am I Now?

Hi! I don't really post here anymore. Where can you find me? Probably the most similar place is my personal tumblr, where I write about stuff that matters to me (a warning though, I'm more of a Tumblry person now than I was when I wrote stuff here). And all the current projects that are important to me, you can find at my website

Aug. 20th, 2013


How I Learned to Enjoy Sweets Better

I love sweet things. If I were not inhibited by my sense of health (and other things), I would eat icing right out of the can, and lots and lots of candy. Up until recently, I have eaten sweets in a ceremonious manner where I save the sweetest things for last, because they are, in my opinion, the best part. I've done this since I was a child. And recently I've realized that this method actually causes me to enjoy my junk food less than otherwise.

Here's the thing: Let's say I have several cookies in front of me. I separate out the sweetest and best one, and save it for last. Meanwhile, the whole time I'm eating the other cookies, a part of me is thinking about eating that last one, and by the time I get to it, I'm a little sad, because most of my cookies are gone by now. After I eat it, I still have a serious craving for more cookies, because sugar is addictive for me. This does sound a little childish to me, but there's a part of me that still thinks this way.

Eventually I realized that this method of saving the sweeter things for last was not the best way to enjoy something. I realized that if I eat the sweetest cookies first, or the icing on the cake, then I can live entirely in the moment while I'm eating them. Then as I'm eating the less sweet cookies, or the part of the cake that doesn't have icing, I can satisfy the sugar cravings that I got from eating all that sugar before, without intensifying them. This leaves me feeling more satisfied than my other method.

Apr. 5th, 2013


Weird laundromat dream

I had a weird dream this morning. I got a flier for a laundromat in town that I hadn't heard of before. It said $1 for unlimited laundry. I was like, that's an awesome deal! I went to check it out, and it turned out that it was a renovated single bathroom, with only one washing machine, which was an adapted toilet. So I was like, I don't know if I really want to do laundry here after all. There weren't even any dryers, that I can remember, but I don't think that occurred to me in the dream. I guess some things are too good to be true. Even in dreams.

Mar. 18th, 2013


More about 50 Shades of Grey

I was thinking more about 50 Shades of Grey. I thought it was good, but also pretty disturbing. It wasn't the physical acts so much as the emotional aspect of it. In the realm of BDSM, the physical things that happened in the book were very mild. I don't think it's primarily about BDSM, though. I think it's about a man with intimacy and control issues (who happens to be into some aspects of BDSM), and his abusive relationship with Ana (Keep in mind I have only read the first book, so this is just my perspective from what I know so far). I want to talk more about what I thought made the relationship abusive, because I think it's good to recognize these things and not mistake them for "just part of the BDSM lifestyle":

1. Christian made Ana sign a nondisclosure agreement about their sex life. To him, I think the primary purpose was because he was a well-known figure and he didn't want the public to know about his kinky lifestyle. To Ana, it meant that she couldn't talk about what was happening to any of her friends or family, so she couldn't get any outside perspective on the relationship. One of the common characteristics of abusive relationships is that the abuser makes it hard for the the victim to tell anyone about the abuse.

2. He "punished" her when he was angry. I can picture myself being a submissive in a relationship, but I don't think I would ever want my partner to touch me when he was angry with me. Not only would it be a less controlled environment, but I think it would be emotionally harmful to me.

3. He pressured her into getting into a submissive role when it wasn't what she wanted. There were particular instances when he pressured her into enduring pain when she didn't want it. He manipulated her because he knew he had power over her, and that she found him attractive. She recognized that he uses sex as a weapon. Yet he told her that it was all consensual.

4. He tried to put himself in a position where he was in control over most aspects of her life.

5. She could hardly ever be relaxed when she was around him, and she was emotionally tied up in knots during the relationship.

There's probably more, but these are the things that stood out to me.

Mar. 17th, 2013


Fifty Shades of Grey

So, I read Fifty Shades of Grey. After being told it started as Twilight fan fiction, I was curious about it. I wasn't expecting much, but I actually thought it was a really good book. I have only read the first one so far.

I've heard people criticize it for representing submissive/dominant relationships in an unrealistic and abusive manner. I think that's true. I think the relationship in it is abusive, and this idea is sort of swept under the rug by the idea that it's a sub/dom relationship (or at least, that's what the guy is trying to make it into). He starts out doing things that are pretty manipulative, while saying that everything is consensual, but I don't think he fully understands what he's doing, because the only experience he has had before was with self-identified submissives. This becomes more evident as he and the girl communicate more openly with each other.

I was surprised at the character depth and emotional pull of the book, given all the crap I've heard about it. I guess literature is in the eye of the beholder. Although I enjoyed Twilight more, I thought this was a better book - more character-driven and thought-provoking, and with a better sense of perspective from the narrator.

It's interesting, this book is getting so much attention for being erotic, but I don't think the sex scenes add much. I think the story is compelling.

Dec. 28th, 2012


Only You're The One, and how I feel about Lifehouse

First of all, this is going to be a long post, so you may not want to read it if you're not interested in the subject. I know it's been a while since I've written about Lifehouse, except for concert and album reviews. I wanted to write a bit about one of the songs on Almeria, Only You're the One. I think it relates both to how I felt when I went to my first Lifehouse concert, and to how I feel about Lifehouse in general. Some of this occurred to me when I listened to the commentary on The Spin Cast (the episode I'm referring to isn't up yet - technical difficulties or something, but it's the Almeria commentary episode). Anyway, the song obviously describes some sort of concert experience, but beyond that, there are a lot of things in the lyrics that I extrapolate my own meaning from, and also the whole sound of the song captures the sort of excitement that I felt.

This is a night like none before
I knew it when you opened up the door

There are a lot of things I still remember about my first Lifehouse concert. For one thing, I didn't even know whether it was going to be an enjoyable experience or not. I wasn't, and still am not really, a concert person. But there's something different about Lifehouse, and I remember hearing that first soundcheck, while I was still sitting outside, and just knowing that I was hearing Lifehouse play live was amazing to me. By the time the doors opened, I knew it was going to be special.

With a look to paint the sky
Let me read between the lines in your eyes

I remember I was close enough to make eye contact with the band members, and it was really exciting to me. I got really excited when Jason smiled at me - I felt like I was interacting with them.

It's the event we dreamed about
Where we whispered all the words they're shouting out
And now it's one, two, three, four

At my first concert I was at a point where I was just starting to love a lot of the music, and I couldn't help but sing along to it. But I always did it quietly because I didn't want to overpower them.

I'm with you when the lights go down.
Take my hand, I'm all yours now

I know that a concert can be fun if I'm there with my friends, especially while waiting in line, but ultimately when the concert starts, I'm there to see Lifehouse. This was especially true the first time because I didn't know anyone else who was there. And I'm impressed with the degree that Lifehouse can actually connect with the audience at concerts. Like, I remember the first time, they made me feel like I was there with them, not just watching them perform. And that's one reason why I don't like just any concert...

I know you're the only one
That would never lead me on

I don't like watching bands that are being theatrical just for the sake of it. And I know some people do like that. I think this is a hard concept for me to describe, but I like it when a band has a genuine connection with the audience. And I feel like Lifehouse does that for me better than anyone else I've seen. I think one of the reasons why I feel that way is because I feel like their music is genuine, and their music doesn't demonstrate any good qualities that they don't stand behind.

You're the one and only
You're the one and
The only one who keeps it here
In each moment as the voices disappear
The audience stands, the band begins
And it's one, two, three, four

In general, I don't like concerts. I find concerts to be mildly entertaining, if I like the music. Lifehouse is the exception, and there's just about nothing I'd rather do that be at a Lifehouse concert. They're the only ones that I feel that way about.

Dec. 21st, 2012


Reaction to Lifehouse's "Almeria"

So, Lifehouse's newest album, Almeria, recently came out. After hearing mixed reactions from fans, from being sorely disappointed to loving it, I was curious and didn't know what to expect.

I'm not quite sure how to sum up my reaction to it, but most notably, I would say there's a stark contrast between how much I like the individual songs. They're much more different that usual - from each other, and some from anything Lifehouse has done before. And that's kind of cool in some ways. I'm always interested in seeing how Jason Wade does in different genres from his norm. But it also has the downside that some of these songs are so outside of the norm that I don't like them at all. At least not now. I can no longer say that Lifehouse's music is so consistent that I like all of it.

Maybe that's a small loss compared to how much I like some of the other songs. My favorite is Where I Come From, which doesn't seem so different, but definitely has a unique quality to it, and I can't put its appeal into words. And I feel similarly about Only You're the One and Nobody Listen.

One song that stands out to me is Pins and Needles. That song is pretty different from anything Lifehouse has done before, but not extremely different. It's the kind of song I've always wanted Lifehouse to create. It's interesting, somewhat unpredictable and weird, but it's catchy and it still has a familiar emotional hook to it. I want Lifehouse to make more songs like this one!

There are lots of other songs on the album that range from emotional pop-sounding to hard rock/western. I just can't warm up to songs like Right Back Home, although all the fans I've talked to seem to love it. All in all, I think it's cool that they're experimenting with different styles. I absolutely love most of the album, and I love the edge that the deviation adds to a lot of the songs.

Nov. 4th, 2012


Stand Up to Breakfast!

I was thinking about the concept of "breakfast" in our society and it's so weird! Lunch and dinner are pretty similar. There's an endless variety of foods to choose from to construct an appropriate lunch or dinner, and many of them overlap. But breakfast is completely different. There are certain foods we think of as "breakfast" foods. Eating different foods for breakfast, or breakfast foods at other times, is somehow outside of the norm. And I was thinking about this the other day: traditional breakfast foods are generally pretty unhealthy: fluffy white pancakes and waffles, covered with syrup. Bacon, muffins, cereals than have more sugar than grain. Pop tarts, donuts? Let's face it, a lot of these foods qualify as dessert. I don't think all breakfast food in itself is unhealthy. What bothers me is, vegetables seem to be off-limits, except in the one case that you're having an omelet. Fruit is okay, on the side, as an afterthought. Unless you count dessert as a meal, breakfast is the unhealthiest meal of the day!

These foods are all things I love to eat sometimes, but not the first thing I want to eat upon awakening. Do you really want to wake up and stuff yourself full of carbs, sugar, and fat, and feel gross and bloated and really tired until lunch? That's not how I like to start my day, so I'm rebelling against breakfast. When I wake up, the first thing I eat is a chicken green salad. It's just what I want then, and it's refreshing. I feel much better eating all those heavy foods later in the day.

How do you feel about breakfast? Remember, you don't have to limit your diet to what society dictates. Stand up to breakfast!

Oct. 17th, 2012


Lifehouse Concert #22: Mix106 Philadelphia

So, remember a while ago when I talked about getting into the PST Live Lounge to see Lifehouse? It was an agonizing, anxious process, but I got in. A few months ago I told myself I wouldn't do that again - I wasn't going to call radio stations in a panic, chasing after these precious exclusive intimate Lifehouse performance passes. After all, I've already experienced that whole thing before.

So the passes to this next event just kinda fell into my hands by accident. Mix106 was like "Tweet this, and follow us." So I did, and next thing I know I get an e-mail saying I won. And most of my fan friends had won too. And Lifehouse had re-treeted it, so I figured there were going to be tons of people there if it's that easy to get into. It turned out to be only a small room full, and the event was a lot like the Live Lounge, except there was also a period where they asked the audience for questions. I ended up in the front row off to the left, the side where Jason was sitting. They first played Somewhere In Between, which I don't think I've ever seen them perform before (in person) but it's one of my favorite songs! So that was cool.

By the way, this whole thing was being recorded and live steamed to the entire world (or anyone who wanted to watch it on the station's website, anyway). The radio DJ's did some interview-chatter in between songs, and they asked the audience for a few questions. I didn't have any questions prepared, so I didn't raise my hand. I hoped some of my friends would have good questions to ask. Someone asked if they were going to record the song Angeline, which I thought was cool because I like that song, and Jason was surprised that she knew it. I was like "I love that song!" And then (this part is a little confusing because what I thought happened wasn't what really happened when I watched the livestream again) Jason looked at me and he was like, "You do? Oh, thanks you!" And at the same time Bryce said, "Hey, Sylvia, how are you?" And the DJ's cut him off before I could respond, so they could get more questions from the audience. What I thought happened at the moment was that Jason said all of it, instead of Bryce. I guess I was a little out of it, haha. And I was thinking, wow, Jason just said hi to me on a live stream that who knows how many people in the world are watching right now.

So after the performance we got to get pictures with the band. That was cool. I was wearing my green stenciled Lifehouse shirt, and I unzipped my sweater so they could see it, and Bryce commented on it when he saw me, and asked if I made it. Then Jason and Rick gave me hugs, and Dara and I posed for a photo with them. I don't know if Bryce is less comfortable with hugging people, but he always goes in for a handshake, and he's never hugged me, whereas Jason has hugged me every time he saw me the last several times.


All in all, it was an awesome event. Well worth the tweet.

Oct. 1st, 2012


Lifehouse Concert #21: MLB Fan Cave, New York

Hello! I went to another Lifehouse concert today in New York City. It was a free concert, which was cool because I always spend so much traveling to New York. Unless I accidentally buy the wrong (cheaper) train ticket, and I just sit there looking suspicious, waiting for someone to confront me about it but no one seems to notice or care. Not that that happened. And I'm sure no one riding that train ever gets "Penn Station, Newark" and "Penn Station, New York" mixed up.

Anyway, I decided to wear my Kelsey Wynn Harris Foundation shirt to the concert. If anyone doesn't know who Kelsey is, she was a Lifehouse fan who died of cancer, but before that she got to spend a day in the studio with Lifehouse while they were recording, and she posted a blog about it. So I was wearing one of the shirts from the organization that her family founded in her honor. And while we were waiting in line for the concert, Lifehouse pulled up in a black van right in front of the line. They started talking to some fans, so I went over to them, and Bryce noticed my shirt! He said that they had shirts like that too, which I knew because Kelsey wrote that she gave those shirts to Lifehouse when she was in the studio with them. He pointed it out to Jason too (who seemed really happy to see me, as always), and we started talking about Kelsey and how they had her in the studio, which I thought was really cool. Jason said she was a really sweet girl.

The concert was pretty cool. They played the new single, Between the Raindrops, which I love, and other fans don't seem as enthusiastic about. It was a cozy venue. I'm glad I went to that concert, because probably after their next album, Lifehouse will be opening for some big shot in arenas, and I won't want to go to those concerts.

Aug. 17th, 2012


Vampire Romance Media

What is it that I like so much about vampire romance media? I never really liked the idea of vampires much, being all blood-sucking and evil and creepy. But independent of that, I got into Buffy and Twilight and other similar shows or pieces of fiction that portray vampire romances. They all seem to have certain things in common. For instance, the vampires in the main romance aren't like normal vampires - they're not evil at all, and they don't kill people. I don't know what it is exactly, but I don't think it's the fact that they're vampires that makes me like them. I think something about the dynamic of the stories makes those vampires the sorts of characters that I like. And I don't know why I don't see more characters like that in non-vampire media.

Maybe it's more than that, though. Maybe it's the whole idea that they're not supposed to be good people, but they are anyway. I think part of what makes me like them is that vampires tend to be superhuman, and their extra power puts them in a protective role over the objects of their affection. However, that's not so much the case in Buffy, because Buffy isn't the protected type - she's the slayer.

And maybe added to that idea is the fact that the select few (or one) good vampires feel responsible for protecting other people from their own kind.

I don't know. What do you think? If you like vampire romances, what do you like about them? And if you don't, do you still have any idea of why so many people do?

Aug. 8th, 2012


We Are Building A Religion

Within the last year I became involved in starting a new religion, Why This Way. I was hesitant to call it a religion for a few reasons. One of them is that it isn't what I think of as a religion: it isn't a theology. But it is a system of beliefs about other things. Another reason was that I think saying that we're starting a new religion might raise red flags for people that I know in my church. Like, if you start your own religion, you'll be worshiping yourselves. But it's just a matter of definition. If I said we're starting a new organization to promote health in every aspect of life, I don't think it would sound bad.

What's the point of Why This Way? It's always hard for me to sum up, because it is about every aspect of life. It started with Alex's vision, and It's not something I would have thought up on my own. Why? Because it seems too obvious. Just looking at our page of core beliefs, I would have thought that some of these things aren't even worth mentioning. But I think that's because they were already so ingrained into the way that I think, and I interact with a community of people who I perceive to think that way too. I guess it sometimes doesn't occur to me that it's not like that everywhere, and the more I've been involved in this, the more I've been able to identify things that don't fit with these beliefs, and don't seem right. Especially in the media.

We established (and are still establishing) our beliefs by coming to a consensus about what we think is important for a healthy and functional society. I've been asked before whether the idea that we don't mention God means that we're humanist or naturalist, but it doesn't mean that. We don't mention God because we know that people have different beliefs about God and we only deal with things that we can have a consensus about within our belief system. We're not here to replace other religions, but to exist along with them, and maybe influence them in positive ways. We also want to create an environment of respect for each other's personal beliefs about God.

One thing that's unique about Why This Way is that the first things we established were about the organization's decision-making process. This is because we often see organizations doing things in their governments that don't seem to make sense according to their values, and we want to avoid that as much as possible. We establish things by consensus, and we have rules of communication to encourage respectful dialog and minimize escalation of conflict. Although we have our set of core beliefs, the rules of communication are the first things we established, and our beliefs sort of grew from them. So although we are about health and holism in general, I guess our religion is very focused on respectful communication, and the idea that a lot more can be accomplished by people actually listening to each other and attempting to build a consensus than people might think. We want to bring that idea into as many areas of life as possible, like political debates, advertising, and education.

Jun. 26th, 2012


Prejudiced Against Herbal Tea

I've always said that I don't like herbal tea, and I'm finding that I don't dislike it so much, although in general I like black and dark white teas better. It wasn't that I was repulsed by it, I just always thought it tasted boring, like water. But I think one of the major reasons why I thought that was because I always added cream and sugar to my black tea, and I thought herbal teas were "supposed" to be drunk plain. Of course, a lot of fruit herbal teas don't mix well with cream, they curdle it. But other common tea herbs like honeybush and chamomile actually taste good with cream, I recently discovered. I still don't like rooibos, and maybe that's one reason why I have that prejudice against herbal teas. I think rooibos is a very common herb used in herbal tea blends.

Sometimes I think people will think it's weird that I add cream to almost every kind of tea. But hey, I know someone (you know who you are) who used to add milk to her fruity tea, and drink it that way, even though the milk curdled. So really, there's no wrong way to eat a Reese's, right? Or drink tea... This whole thing relates to this post I read a while back about tea and "should" statements.

Mar. 27th, 2012


Dream: Lifehouse and the stolen page

I had a weird dream this morning. I was going to a Lifehouse concert, and I was with some friends, and one of them thought she found a page of lyrics that Jason Wade had written, so she took it and gave it to me, thinking that I would appreciate having it. The whole time I was there, I felt kind of bad and guilty about having that page, because I thought maybe Jason needed it. I was also afraid he was going to find out.

It was a concert where there was only one row of people standing at the stage, and I was in the row, and everyone else was sitting down way further back, in the rows of chairs or on the floor in front of them. I noticed I was wearing a shirt that was supposed to say Lifehouse but it was somehow cut off and it only said "Lifehi." I don't know how that makes sense, but it did in the dream. I was thinking "how did this happen? Oh well." So Jason wade was playing some music but he was mostly talking to the fans. He wanted us to sing a song without instruments so he could see if we could hold a tune without going out of key.

After the concert I was talking to the band members, and they were talking about pieces of paper and stuff, and I was so afraid that the missing sheet that I had was going to come up, and like, I didn't want to bring it up, because I wasn't sure that the person who stole it for me would want me to say anything. But later I decided I wanted to return it, so I was talking to Jason later, and it was just the two of us, and I was afraid of how he was going to react. I handed him the piece of paper and I was like, "she took this, I think maybe it belonged to you." And he was like, "Did I write this?" I was thinking how would I know? But anyway, he didn't seem upset at all, so it was cool.

Nov. 17th, 2011


Everybody Knows Jason

So, I noticed that Alyssa Bernal had an album out, and one of the songs was called "Everybody Knows Jason." The funny thing is that Alyssa toured with Lifehouse a while back and even recorded a duet with Jason Wade. I was so curious about this song that I downloaded it, and I thought it was so amusing that I typed out the lyrics. I have no idea who the Jason in the song is.

Everybody Knows Jason

I wrote another letter for Jason yesterday.
He hasn't replied yet, but really that's okay.
He tends to be quite busy on Tuesdays
And on Wednesdays, but I'm going to call him on Thursday.
My friends call me aggressive. They tell me I need help.
I don't know what they're talking about. I feel swell.
I'm so in love with Jason and he's so in love with me.
He just doesn't know it yet, you see.

'Cause everybody knows Jason, and everybody knows me.
They say that I should leave him alone, let him be.
And everybody says Jason really doesn't care.
Well maybe if I lose some weight, or change my hair...

They say he's in a meeting. I know that that's a lie.
They say they're gonna call the police and I don't know why.
But I know my sweet Jason, he's really quite fragile
But I can protect him from the crazy world outside.

'Cause everybody knows Jason, and everybody knows me.
They say that I should leave him alone, let him be.
And everybody says Jason really doesn't care.
Well maybe if I lose some weight, or change my hair...

Well, I send him lots of flowers, confessions of my love.
He claims he's got a girl. I don't know what he's speaking of.
Jason is a cutie, but he gets a bit confused
But I love him and he's perfect for me.


Oct. 30th, 2011


A Funny Boggle Moment

So, I have a funny story. I was playing boggle with my mom, and I thought maybe I could get the word "bosom," but I completely forgot how to spell it! So I started writing down all these possible variations that I could get, in case they were the right spelling, just to cover my bases. And I knew that if I could get "bosom," I could also get "bosomed," so I had to write down all those variations, too. At the end of the round, most of what I had written down were various misspellings of the word "bosom" and "bosomed." None of them were correct, I found. I was explaining all this to my mom, while keeping my list to myself. And I was a little bit embarrassed at the number of misspellings that I thought might have been correct. I went to get some juice, and I noticed that my mom was looking at my paper, and I blurted out, without thinking, "Don't look at my bosoms!" Then I realized what I had said and we all started cracking up. My dad was in the room too.

Jul. 15th, 2011


Lifehouse concert #20: Fox & Friends

So, I went to another Lifehouse event that was this morning at 7:30 in New York at Fox News. I got there at 5:30 AM, and there was no line at the stage, but I'm glad I got there early because Lifehouse was doing their sound check! So I joined Christy and some of her new friends to watch it. A sad story that I never shared publicly before is that I lost the pick that Bryce had given me at the Smoke & Mirrors release concert. It wasn't that I was careless about it, but I thought it might be cool to bring it back to a concert and get Bryce to sign it. So I brought it back to New York last fall, but I didn't get it signed, and when I got home, it was gone. So, anyway, Christy was really nice and she asked Bryce for another pick for me, so now I have one again!

Jason came out to take pictures after the sound check, and Christy and I got a picture with Jason. We had one of those moments where the person taking the picture took a while and had to ask about the camera, so Jason and I were just standing there half-hugging for a couple of minutes. And I got to thank Jason for singing All In All for me! Which I wanted to do ever since he did it. He chatted with us for a few minutes, but I always get these weird blackouts about what they talk about. And then, Vicky called us and said that she saw us, me and Christy, on TV, talking to Jason! The event was televised on Fox News, and apparently we got a lot of air time because we were in the front row! I was excited, because I've never been on TV before! Haha. But also, Lifehouse was awesome. They played a few songs, and Jason talked about the marriage proposal that he did to a guy at a concert!

So, after the show me and Christy and some other friends that I just met went to go hang out and get food, and we randomly spotted Jackson Rathbone in Times Square! He was on the phone, and my friend really wanted to talk to him, but we hesitated and after a while he left. So I had a pretty awesome time. Totally worth waking up at 2:30 AM.

Mar. 22nd, 2011


My Egg

I had an amusing incident with my eggs and sausage today, and it was a little sad that I was the only one there to witness it. It was almost like a Seinfeld moment. I was eating a plate of an egg and a sausage on the edge of my desk. When I was cutting my egg, I didn't realize that the pressure point was actually off the edge of my desk at the moment, and the plate flipped over, the egg landed on my arm, and the plate and sausage fell to the ground. My plate was on the left side of my chair, and my left arm was the one that the egg fell on, so I was trying to reach my plate with that arm while still holding it in such a way that the egg didn't fall off. It was a pretty slippery egg, because I had fried it in oil. Anyway, I did manage to pick up my plate and bring the egg to safety.

Feb. 20th, 2011


Writer's Block: Songs of patriotism

If you were a country, what would be your national anthem?

If I were a country? What's that supposed to mean? Well, I guess since I am a cult, I can also be a country. But patriotism seems a little pointless for a country of one person. And maybe a little arrogant, too. But nonetheless, We'll Never Know by Lifehouse seems like a good one. The royal "We," since I'm a queen now.

Feb. 8th, 2011


20 things to do when bored, part 4

1. Find out who put the bomb in the bom shabom.
2. Design a pair of high-heeled gloves.
3. Make oatmeal.
4. Fractalize the alphabet.
5. Microwave different things until something explodes.
6. Go microwave shopping.
7. Learn to speak braille.
8. Put your sister's hand in warm water.
9. If she resists, tell her it's for an experiment, then see how long she'll keep it there.
10. Go bounty hunting.
11. Use the word "stark" as a common adverb to describe a variety of things.
12. Get a hug from Taylor Swift.
13. Whenever you say more than 3 words, first ask your foot for permission to speak.
14. Give someone a nickel whenever someone tells them a certain cliche.
15. Titrate your coffee.
16. Write a pig latin dictionary for blondes.
17. Invent a can-string phone and complain to the phone company about bad reception.
18. Keep a list of the funniest things to say, and only say them when someone is taking a sip of their drink.
19. Talk only in palindromes for a day.
20. Build a gingerbread model of the Eiffel Tower.

Jan. 30th, 2011


World-Changing Ideas

I just found this blog from one of my friends on world-changing ideas, and I think it has a lot of stuff in it that I don't normally think about, but that could make gradual differences to improve the world. At the end of each post, there's a list of things you can do to bring the ideas to life. Read it

Jan. 9th, 2011


A Hug From Taylor Swift

I've been looking for awesome fan stories with rock stars, and I found the best one yet: ahugfromtaylorswift.com. It's about these two guys who start a website with their mission to get a hug from Taylor Swift, and what's ends up happening is pretty awesome. Here's the page with challenge 1: click here and watch the videos from the bottom up, then go to challenge 2, etc. I'm not much of a Taylor Swift fan, but I still think this is worth watching.

Dec. 26th, 2010


Fan Crazy

Fan Crazy, a Lifehouse fan fictionCollapse )

Dec. 25th, 2010


Something I Found In My Old Journal


Everything was perfect.
It was how it was supposed to be.
The music and the dancing
And the light
Made it hard to see.
I wore a pretty dress
Pretty shoes, everything was perfect.
Nothing was all right.
I wore a pretty dress
But the only thing that you could see
Was right through me.

Dec. 19th, 2010


What Would You Do

I found this show on Hulu called What Would You Do? It's not that old show from Nick with Mark Summers, it's some ABC News thing. It's a hidden camera show where actors play out dangerous, controversial, or awkward scenarios in front of real bystanders to see how they react. I think everyone should watch it, because personally I don't give a lot of thought about what I would do in certain situations that might require immediate decisions, and that's probably true about a lot of people. All of the scenarios are based on real events that either happen frequently, or happened recently and resulted in some tragedy because no one did anything to stop it. A lot of them are people just acting racist or offensive to see if anyone will stand up to them. I think there's a lot of insight about what exactly needs to be done in those situations, because a lot of people just don't do anything because they don't know what they should do, and I can definitely picture myself being in that boat. And the thing is, I don't see these things happening regularly, at least not to the same extent, and seeing them played out and watching people respond, I think would make me more attuned to noticing when something actually is wrong. It also raises awareness about the assumptions that witnesses make based on the stereotypes of the people involved, and how that affects their response. Watch it

Dec. 3rd, 2010


Top 10 Albums of 2010

I don't actually own all of these albums, since I don't buy music that often, but this was an assignment, so I came up with these as best I could. I do have the first 3.

1. Smoke & Mirrors by Lifehouse - Amazing album by my favorite band. I bought it the day it came out and I fell in love with it beyond reason. It made all other music seem pointless for almost a month.

2. Flamingo by Brandon Flowers - I was already a big fan of the Killers, but this album trumped all of their music for me. Now Brandon Flowers is my favorite solo artist of all time.

3. Just Another Ghost by Sleeperstar - Breann introduced me to Sleeperstar, and I love it!

4. Invented by Jimmy Eat World - From here on I don't actually own these albums, but I plan on getting this one eventually.

5. Loud by Rihanna

6. The Light Meets the Dark by Tenth Avenue North - Awesome Christian band.

7. My World 2.0 by Justin Bieber - Yes, I'm a Belieber, and I'm not ashamed.

8. Greatest Hits... So Far!!! by P!nk

9. Devil Music by J Minus

10. No Chocolate Cake by the Gin Blossoms

Nov. 24th, 2010


something funny I made


Nov. 19th, 2010


Another favorite commercial

Nov. 13th, 2010


Eternal Lifehouse of the Breannless Mind

A Lifehouse fan fiction about BreannCollapse )

Nov. 11th, 2010


Lifehouse Dreams

I had a couple of Lifehouse dreams this morning. In the first one, I was going through all my old Buffy stuff, and I came across a soundtrack that contained a whole copy of No Name Face. I was going to give it away, since I already have another copy, but I found this insert in it that was signed by all the 2001 members of Lifehouse, and it had personal messages to me from each of them, and a general message saying that they loved the songs I sent them. I was like weird, why don't I remember this? I must have been a bigger fan than I remembered back in 2001, and I sent them some songs. I was suddenly really excited because I had found these old messages that Lifehouse had sent to me!

The second one I was at some event that Lifehouse was supposed to be at, but it wasn't a performance, it was something else. I don't know what it was. Anyway, I was standing outside, and I saw Lifehouse going in, and I stopped Jason because I wanted to thank him for what he did for me at the Electric Factory. Then he started explaining that when he first did it, he thought I was someone else, and he made a deal with some other fan that he would take her song request, and he thought I was her at first, but then realized I was me and just went along with it. I wasn't really disappointed, because he seemed so open about it, and he didn't regret it, and I wasn't very surprised, either. Then I went to go look for Bryce so I could tell him something, but he looked like he was always headed somewhere, so I just followed him around for a while until he didn't look busy. Then I said something to him, but he was just like, "Oh, that's cool." like he wasn't really paying attention and he was about to leave so he could get back to what he was doing.

Oct. 21st, 2010


Lifehouse Concert #19: The Ridiculous Philadelphia Incident

So, today was the first time I saw Lifehouse in the same place again - at the Electric Factory. Yup. It was pretty awesome. I somehow managed to get into the front row, right between Jason and Bryce, even with the VIPs who got in early. Speaking of VIPs, one of my friends who got the VIP gave me their autographed poster! Now I have something that's signed by all four band members. Anyway, the concert was awesome and all.

Soooo, during the acoustic bit, Jason was taking requests. I was thinking of trying to get him to play All In All, but I can't shout loud enough. We always talk about how Jason plays the same songs, and it's like he doesn't even listen to the requests, and he plays Everything even though that comes later in the set. So he was listening and he said, "Take Me Away?" and we were all like, yes, he's going to play something different! And then he was like, "Oh, no, Everything?" Haha. Yeah.

So, after he played Everything, he looked at me and said, "What do YOU want to hear, Sylvia?" I couldn't believe it. I tried to say All In All, but I couldn't speak loud enough, so Sam helped me. I think he got it, because he said, "All In All?" And then he started playing the chorus of the song, looking at me the whole time. After he finished, he said, "That's for you, Sylvia," or something. Fortunately we'll know what the exact words were because Yuliya got the whole thing on video! I'll post that later, I hope.

I just can't believe Jason would do that again. I would have thought a fan only gets one name-specified stage shout-out per lifetime. And not only that, I got a song dedication. Of my choice.

Anyway, When Jason sang Falling In, I was really excited about it, I couldn't stop smiling, and he kept looking at me and smiling. I think he was amused by my amazement.

Edit: It wasn't exactly the way I remembered, but here it is: 2 minutes in.

Oct. 18th, 2010


Lifehouse Concert #18: Roseland Ballroom

It was pretty cool last night. In line we played my Lifehouse Apples to Apples game, and it was funny. It was great to see everyone again. I wasn't sure how many VIPs there would be and how they would affect our places, but Sam & I ended up in the 3rd row right in front of Bryce, which I thought was pretty good. This time we were really in front of him and not off to the side of the stage. The stage was pretty far from from the railing, though, so I had a really good view of Jason, but there was a tall guy between me and Bryce. The concert was pretty awesome. I'm always surprised at how much I like their performance of Wash. I always think Wash isn't one of my favorite songs, but when they perform it, something clicks. Same with Everything at the end. Everything was their second encore and everyone looked really exhausted, and I was exhausted too, but there was this moment where everything seemed to stop, and I was watching Bryce for a while and he smiled at me. Sometimes I can't tell when Jason is looking at me because his eyes are so shadowed, but looked in my direction a lot and smiled. I think this is the first time I've seen this in real life: Jason sometimes comes down from the stage when he's singing First Time and hops up on the ledge in front of the barricade. He did that this time right in front of where I was. It was pretty cool. I could reach him if I wanted to, but everyone was grabbing for his hand, and I reached for it too but I don't know if I touched him or just a bunch of other fans. Anyway, those were the highlights. I didn't get home until like 3:30 again.

Oct. 12th, 2010



When I woke up I didn't remember right away, but I had this series of Lifehouse concert dreams. I only remember bits and pieces. In the first one it was like a small acoustic concert. Jason was just sitting in a chair playing songs, and he might have been taking requests, I don't remember. But at one point the other band members were doing stuff, and Jason was back in the audience, sitting by this little girl who had tattoos all over her. He accidentally bumped into her and she started bleeding. Jason was like, "oh, sorry, I forgot!" Then Jason sang "You Belong to Me" at the end. Apparently there was an encore, but I had left and I didn't realize, so I was trying to get back to the stage, and I had to climb up all these buildings because I didn't want to waste time scurrying around the stairs and hallways. And then the room for the concert was so small that I couldn't get in, I could only stick my finger in there, and everyone was tiny. Then later I was another concert where there was a stage. It was still just Jason, but someone requested a song and Jason said, "should I just do this one acoustic, or bring out the other guys?" Everyone said bring out the other guys. So Jason went to get the rest of the band, and then they said that if they had the whole band there, the fans were only allowed to come up to a certain point, because otherwise it was a fire hazard. I guess it was because they were using electric instruments. I'm sure there was more, but that's all I can remember at the moment.

Oct. 10th, 2010


Lifehouse concert #17: Frostburg

So, yesterday I went to see Lifehouse at Frostburg university. This is the furthest I've ever traveled for Lifehouse - the place is a 4 1/4 hour drive from me. And this is one of those concerts where I kept changing my mind about whether I could justify going, and whenever I decided not to, I felt this terrible feeling in my stomach. So, I concluded that this concert was an important one not to miss.

I met up with Sam, who drive us most of the way. And this was the first time I had met her, but I thought we got along swimmingly. Haha. When we got there we met Christine and her friend, who told us Lifehouse was about to get here, and showed us the entrance where they come in. So we went outside, and just that minute, we saw a white van pull up. I looked in the windows, and sure enough, there was Lifehouse. "There they are," I said. And as they started getting out, the other girls sat down behind the wall, so Lifehouse couldn't see them. I was a little confused, but I was in plain sight, so Lifehouse came over and said hi. I didn't know who to respond to because all four of them were there at the same time. But I think I said hi to them. Bryce asked me how I was, and I asked him, and then he asked me if I live around here. I said no, we drove like four hours to get here. So then Sam asked if we could get pictures, so Jason was like "yeah" and everyone was getting pictures with him. I'm not sure what was happening at this point, it gets a little blurry. I think Jason said I should get a picture with him next, and I was like, "I don't have a camera. I have my.." And then the others said they'd get the picture for me. So I stood next to Jason, and I was looking over at the rest of the members of Lifehouse who were just standing off to the side and I was thinking, "Why don't they get in the picture too?" But I didn't say anything. The whole thing just happened. Then Bryce was hanging around and he asked me how the comics were going. "Good," I said. And then I said, "Actually not very well. I'm running out of video blogs." And Bryce said, "Well, I'd make more, if they'd let me." I didn't know what he meant by that. "You should make a comic about that," he said, or something I couldn't really hear. Then I asked him if he got the book I gave Jason and Rick. He said, "Yeah, we read the whole thing. It's awesome (or something) You're very talented." "Thanks!" I said. Then they all went inside.

Later we met Cori, who said she got to meet Lifehouse too. That was exciting. So then it was time for the concert. We had 2nd row seats on the end, but they were actually off to the side of the stage, since the stage was so small. I think they had the same set as they did in Europe, with the same little acoustic-request bit that Rick interrupts during The End Has Only Begun. I really enjoyed it. Bryce gave us some smiles.

So we were driving home, and I was thinking, "wow, Bryce told me I'm very talented." And then I got a text from Cori that said, "Sylvia!!! Bryce says your cool, chill, and he wonders how you can read their minds!" I read it and I was like what. I was really confused - I couldn't fathom the idea that Bryce talks to other fans about me. After everything that happened, I still couldn't get myself to believe this one thing. I kept thinking, "well maybe she meant it some other way." I was just a little crazy, though. Then Cori said she was just talking to Bryce for a while, and she started talking about the comics, and Bryce started talking about how cool I was. Wow. I mean the night was already amazing, but that was just the cherry on the icing. Now, I still don't know what the mind-reading thing was about. I don't know what Bryce is talking about, 'cause I can't even read his mind when he's talking.

Oct. 4th, 2010


You are the only exception

This might seem weird coming from me, but in general, I don't like concerts. How have I been to enough concerts to know this? I've actually seen a lot of different bands opening and one headlining just through seeing Lifehouse so many times. While standing through opening bands, I always just want them to be over. And maybe that's just because I'm so impatient so see Lifehouse, but I did decide to watch Daughtry headlining after Lifehouse and and I had that same feeling. I guess I only stuck around for so long because I thought maybe Jason would come back out at the end. And maybe it's because when I see a band that's touring with Lifehouse, it's never a band that I actually like.

Well, don't get me wrong, I LOVE Switchfoot. I thought they were awesome last night. But there were times during when Switchfoot was performing, when I felt like I was just waiting for it to end. Why does this happen with a band I love so much, and that puts on such an great performance? Well, It made me realize a few things about why I love Lifehouse so much, and the little things about their concerts that I take for granted for lack of comparison.

One thing that set the bar for this concert, is that it was my first real Switchfoot concert, so the experience I had to compare it to was my first Lifehouse concert. You probably know the story about my 5th Lifehouse concert, where Jason recognized me. Well, at my first Lifehouse concert, the first time I ever saw Lifehouse, I remember Jason looking at me and smiling at me just like he recognized me. Maybe I was smiling the whole time, I don't remember, but when I walked into that first Lifehouse concert, I was worried. I thought, "I'm not a concert person - what if I don't like it?" And I don't know what Lifehouse did exactly to grab my attention so wholeheartedly and make me want them to not ever stop playing. It's hard to explain.

One thing that I'm noticing the more I see other bands - often their music is so loud and distorted, I can't even hear the notes. All I hear is this loud noise, and it seems like every note is in the same ridiculous pitch. When Lifehouse performs, I can actually hear the music. I can actually hear Jason singing. Another thing - and this is a more subtle thing that, I don't know, maybe it's just my own perception. When most bands perform, their goal is to put on a good performance - to impress the audience. And I think despite a lot of bands' interactive stage antics, Lifehouse is one of the only ones I've seen that actually tries more to connect with their audience while performing than to impress them. Not only to impress them, but to be impressed by them. And the way they do it seems so genuine and quiet, just like my own approach to life. So, I can't help feeling like I'm right there with them, not just watching them. And I'm sure every band has their own way of connecting with the audience that just doesn't resonate with me. I don't like it when opening bands try to get you all hyped up and make you do stuff. Like if I want to get into the music, I will because I like the music, not because you told me to. I mean, I guess it works for most people. I dunno, it just makes everything seem fabricated. I don't think Lifehouse ever asks for much from their audience. Occasionally they have to ask people to stand up, but that's the least you can do, if your legs work. Yeah, so, all the things I don't like about concerts, and still, a Lifehouse concert is the ultimate experience.

Switchfoot Concert

So, today I went to see Switchfoot on their headlining tour. This is something I've been wanting to do for a while. After I saw them in the Live Lounge, I thought I wanted to see a bigger show from them, but this one ended up being a little crazy. When The Almost was opening, I just kept getting more and more irritated for some reason. I didn't like them at all, and they got the crowd to start moshing, which the crowd continued to do during Switchfoot's set. Katelyn and I started out about 4 rows deep, due to the Friends of the Foot getting the first few rows, but then after being shoved around a bit, we ended up like 8 rows deep. And I couldn't see much because the crowd was so thick and everyone was so tall and had their arms up. There were some highlights, though. I think Switchfoot themselves did a great job. I have nothing against them from my experience. I think Jon might have pointed at me while singing "You can't silence my love" at some point. And here's my favorite thing that happened: Some guy in the audience was holding up a sign that said, "It's my birthday! Can I play Stars?" And When John was singing stars, he motioned for the guy to come forward, he pulled him on stage, he got the fans to bring the sign forward, and he held it up so everyone could see it. Then he just handed over his guitar to the guy and continued singing! I mean, what an awesome fan moment! That made my night.

Edit: Here's a funny thing. Near the beginning someone held up a pick of Jon's that they got from him earlier, and said they wanted to trade. So Jon threw him his pick, and the fans passed the old pick forward, and eventually Jon grabbed it and started playing again with that one. It seemed kind of pointless to me, but... interesting. The weird things Switchfoot fans do.

Sep. 20th, 2010


Lifehouse Dream, Jason on Twitter

So, recently Jason Wade just started owning Lifehouse's Twitter account, which used to be controlled by Bryce. It's really nice to hear from him. His tweets are like snippets of the essence of the blogs he used to write on MySpace. Except with a lot more Chuck Norris. Last night he posted a tweet about how he's been reading stories of how his music has touched people's lives, and they inspire him, so he wants us to keep posting them. One thing I love about Jason - he gets bombarded lots with fan tweets every hour, and he seems to love it - he often replies to people, so we know he's reading them.

I had a dream this morning that I was at a Lifehouse concert. And lately I've been having a lot of dreams about waiting in line at a concert, standing at the stage waiting for the band, being late, etc. But this was an actual dream about a concert. And it was the first concert on the Smoke & Mirrors tour, so anything could happen. Lifehouse brought out a bunch of stage antics they'd never done before. Rick started dancing at one point, and it turned into some sort of animation that had to do with Breann. I don't really get that part. Then Jason started singing a song that had something to do with something I said on Twitter last night. I don't know what it was, but it was the series of notes that proved it. And I was so excited that they had used something from something I said! They were talking to us during the concert, and there was this big empty space between the audience and the stage (because we were in seats) and Lifehouse came down from the stage into that space to interact with the fans. It was an incredible experience. After the concert was over, I was just sitting on the floor, coloring in a book or something, talking to the band members while they were taking stuff down from the concert. The best part of it was that it was an amazing dream, but I didn't wake up disappointed that it was only a dream. The excitement and awesomeness was still with me. Probably because I actually got through the whole concert for once, and I got to fully enjoy it.

Sep. 4th, 2010


An Interesting Dream

I had an interesting dream this morning. I dreamed that it was approaching the time of dusk, but it was still completely light out, as I saw it. I was driving in a car with Kendra, and something she said gave me the impression that she thought it was dark. I was talking to her and I said, "weird, it's still completely light out to me," and she said,"Everything's completely dark to me." I thought it was odd. I had never thought about it before, but I just assumed that it was because some people have more light-sensitive eyes, and dusk falls later for them. Soon after that everything looked dark to me too.

Aug. 14th, 2010


Jason's Dentist

(a parody of Here Tomorrow Gone Today)

You got what you wanted, my tooth on a string.
Found my weak spot and cost everything.
I lay on my back and watched you drill away.
Always kill the marrow but not the pain.
Always kill the marrow but not the pai-ai-ain!

You're all talk and I'm not okay-ay-ay.
I can't take, can't take all the terrible pain.
You know how to get this tooth pulled away-ay-ay.
But can't make, can't make all the pain go away.

A talkin' disaster, all in my face
Just a matter of time before you want my concert place
A maniacal master of torture in vain
Always kill the marrow but not the pai-ai-ain!

You're all talk and I'm not okay-ay-ay.
I can't take, can't take all the terrible pain.
You know how to get this tooth pulled away-ay-ay.
But can't make, can't make all the pain go away.
Got a smile and you call me na-a-ames.
I can't take, can't take all the terrible pain.
You're always lookin' for somebody to mai-ai-aim.
You won't make, won't make this pain go away.

Kill the marrow, not the pain...

Aug. 13th, 2010


Jason Wade Dream

I had a weird dream this morning. I was waiting for Lifehouse to post their tour dates, and I went to see Jason in his office. Yeah, he had on office in my dream, and he was sitting at a desk. So I was asking him about the tour dates, and gave me a stack of papers and asked me if I could lay them out on the table by the hall for people to pick up. I guess sometimes fans stopped by to get information about the tour, and he wanted to make it easily accessible. It was weird - like the internet didn't exist or something. I looked at the papers and they had all the tour dates written on them. I was like, wow, I can't wait to actually look at them and see when they'll be near me! So after I laid them out on the table, I went back to Jason's desk to tell him I was finished, and I wanted to stay there and talk to him, but I didn't know whether I should just leave him alone to do his work. That's when the dream changed.

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